The Story of how Juan got unFunction:TUNED, FTL!!! *BOOM!!!*
06-10-2007, 02:33 PM
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The Story of how Juan got unFunction:TUNED, FTL!!! *BOOM!!!*
Setting: Ocean City, @ 7-11 on a warm Friday night it all began with....
Kristan: (joking around) "Hey, look at that car! it's like... a FOOT away from yours! She musta hit you!"
Everyone watches a lady pull away from Juan's car going toward our direction, Juan's attention focuses on his bumper...
Juan: *runs to the car that's pulling away* "HEY! You HIT ME!!!"
Lady: "really? no i didn't"
Juan: *grabs onto her car as if he can really stop a moving vehicle with one hand* "No really... you HIT me"
Lady: "no way... let me go take a look.."
Me: "HOLY $&%!!!!!!!!" *runs toward his unFunction:TUNED bumper*
Juan: "looks like you got it pretty bad..."
Lady: "Oh wow... I didn't even notice I hit something..."
(in the meantime, abui01 goes camera phone crazy on her azz)
Juan: "Get her plates! Call the police!!!"
(Kristan dials police, they arrive within 5 mins and begin inspecting the damages)
*Lady in Red: OoO Looogie mee! I'm a moron that hit someone and tried to get away with it! ... now I'm gettin PwNzeReD by these rice buckets who are too meticulous about their cars... sheeesh.. it's ONLY a scratch!* Here she is getting grilled by your friendly neighborhood law enforcement:
(Little blonde girl pictured above
"Mommy hit someone... Mommy hit someone!!!"
Officers are seen below inspecting the unFunction:TUNED vehicle:
Lady: *looking at Kristan* "Oh look at those seat belts, he must be one of those maniac drivers huh?"
Juan: *interjects before Kristan can answer* "No actually it's just for looks, we drive very slow..."
Lady: "Wow... that barely did anything to my bumper... but wow... look at yours..."
(Her rear bumper pictured below)
*YUP, im gonna stand around and look like a douche bag!*
Me: "Looks like that dented bumper is going to restrict your aerodynamics, you're going to have to get an oil cooler to makeup for the power loss..."
Juan: "OMG! Look! My headlight is scratched!... that means replacement..!!!"
Me: "Dibs on your broken headlight!"
Umzz: "Screw that, I called dibs first!!"
Juan: "Shoot... I just made $1000!!! Good things come to those who wait!"
(Umzz is the last to be unFunctionTUNED, stay TUNED for his story!!!)
------------------------------------------------------------------
To Be Continued:
"The Story of Alberto... The unFunctionalDRUNK"
and...
"The Story of Function:FLIRT: Randomly picking up chicks and look like a total fool while doing it!!!" (photos will come shortly when those ladies send them to us)
Kristan: (joking around) "Hey, look at that car! it's like... a FOOT away from yours! She musta hit you!"
Everyone watches a lady pull away from Juan's car going toward our direction, Juan's attention focuses on his bumper...
Juan: *runs to the car that's pulling away* "HEY! You HIT ME!!!"
Lady: "really? no i didn't"
Juan: *grabs onto her car as if he can really stop a moving vehicle with one hand* "No really... you HIT me"
Lady: "no way... let me go take a look.."
Me: "HOLY $&%!!!!!!!!" *runs toward his unFunction:TUNED bumper*
Juan: "looks like you got it pretty bad..."
Lady: "Oh wow... I didn't even notice I hit something..."
(in the meantime, abui01 goes camera phone crazy on her azz)
Juan: "Get her plates! Call the police!!!"
(Kristan dials police, they arrive within 5 mins and begin inspecting the damages)
*Lady in Red: OoO Looogie mee! I'm a moron that hit someone and tried to get away with it! ... now I'm gettin PwNzeReD by these rice buckets who are too meticulous about their cars... sheeesh.. it's ONLY a scratch!* Here she is getting grilled by your friendly neighborhood law enforcement:
(Little blonde girl pictured above
"Mommy hit someone... Mommy hit someone!!!"Officers are seen below inspecting the unFunction:TUNED vehicle:
Lady: *looking at Kristan* "Oh look at those seat belts, he must be one of those maniac drivers huh?"
Juan: *interjects before Kristan can answer* "No actually it's just for looks, we drive very slow..."
Lady: "Wow... that barely did anything to my bumper... but wow... look at yours..."
(Her rear bumper pictured below)
*YUP, im gonna stand around and look like a douche bag!*
Me: "Looks like that dented bumper is going to restrict your aerodynamics, you're going to have to get an oil cooler to makeup for the power loss..."
Juan: "OMG! Look! My headlight is scratched!... that means replacement..!!!"
Me: "Dibs on your broken headlight!"
Umzz: "Screw that, I called dibs first!!"
Juan: "Shoot... I just made $1000!!! Good things come to those who wait!"
(Umzz is the last to be unFunctionTUNED, stay TUNED for his story!!!)
------------------------------------------------------------------
To Be Continued:
"The Story of Alberto... The unFunctionalDRUNK"
and...
"The Story of Function:FLIRT: Randomly picking up chicks and look like a total fool while doing it!!!" (photos will come shortly when those ladies send them to us)
06-10-2007, 02:46 PM
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ha ha actually when the lady asked if he is a crazy driver, i said the seats were just for looks while Juan mumbles, "you obviously don't have to be going fast to hit someone."
06-10-2007, 03:02 PM
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damn homie everyone seems to be getting in accidents lately. At least Juan caught her before she escaped...
Last edited by Armando; 06-10-2007 at 03:36 PM.
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06-10-2007, 04:10 PM
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Umzz: "Screw that, I called dibs first!!"
haha that was seriously the first thing that came out if his mouth.. it was classic
edit: I'll let you know if those pics come in ha
haha that was seriously the first thing that came out if his mouth.. it was classic
edit: I'll let you know if those pics come in ha
06-10-2007, 04:49 PM
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Originally Posted by chuquison
is that a AWD sticker on the hood? is the z AWD?
That sucks Juan, go to Arthur for your body work man.
06-10-2007, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by C5_vette
Umzz: "Screw that, I called dibs first!!"
haha that was seriously the first thing that came out if his mouth.. it was classic
edit: I'll let you know if those pics come in ha
haha that was seriously the first thing that came out if his mouth.. it was classic
edit: I'll let you know if those pics come in ha
IF THOSE LIGHTS COME OFF THE CAR THEY WILL GO ON MINE!!
Ahn you better not try and pull some sort of last second asian deal on me and take them!
speaking of my turn i almost got unFunctionTUNED right after we left the parking lot where juan got hit on the way back to the hotel when a SUV was making a uturn and decided to stop in my lane...thank the ricer gods for my BBK!
Last edited by umzzz; 06-10-2007 at 05:10 PM.
06-10-2007, 05:49 PM
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Originally Posted by C5_vette
I'll let you know if those pics come in ha
BTW Guys: We utilized some Function:FLIRT techniques on these group of women. They snapped a buncha pictures of us + them and will send them over to C5_Vette when they get a chance. I've already written up the story but pictures make it worth 10x more, hahahaha (Dave is the ultimate P-I-M-P!!!)
Originally Posted by umzzz
speaking of my turn i almost got unFunctionTUNED right after we left the parking lot where juan got hit on the way back to the hotel when a SUV was making a uturn and decided to stop in my lane...thank the ricer gods for my BBK!
@story
