Guys Rules
Guys Rules
This made me LOL
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act
like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing," we will act like nothing's
wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act
like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing," we will act like nothing's
wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.
Registered User
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 319
Likes: 0
From: Martinsburg, WV
man i wish sondra would read this!!! FTW!! 
Originally Posted by HKS-Z
This made me LOL
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act
like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing," we will act like nothing's
wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.
Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act
like soap opera guys.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say nothing," we will act like nothing's
wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
trucks.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.
Trending Topics
Originally Posted by bsurdam
hahaha my ex used to tell me i care more about my car then her. and i told her cause it gives me what i want when i want it, when you can do that ill give more to you lol.
Originally Posted by bsurdam
hahaha my ex used to tell me i care more about my car then her. and i told her cause it gives me what i want when i want it, when you can do that ill give more to you lol.
yeah but my new girl understands, when she says when your done with your car we have to do mine you cant be the only one in the relationship with a nice car, then that girls a keeper!!! wahoo wahoo.
Originally Posted by bsurdam
yeah but my new girl understands, when she says when your done with your car we have to do mine you cant be the only one in the relationship with a nice car, then that girls a keeper!!! wahoo wahoo.
Originally Posted by bsurdam
yeah but my new girl understands, when she says when your done with your car we have to do mine you cant be the only one in the relationship with a nice car, then that girls a keeper!!! wahoo wahoo.
My favorite from the list:
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
